Should I bother filing a sexual harassment complaint?
I want to file a complaint but I am afraid that the whole situation will get worse and the person will retalitate against me. I also feel guilty for letting it go on for so long and not nipping it in the bud. I thought that the person was a friend and had conversations about life, politics, etc. However, this person has been taking it the wrong way and turning the conversation sexual, and saying demeaning things about women in general, and commenting on other females coworkers body parts just to get a reaction. I hate to get people in trouble. But I think the fact that this guy is staying two hours past his shift to talk to me is a bit weird, especially since we have no relationship outside of work. If I avoid talking to him he is offended. I don’t like to be a bitch, and have all of my other co-workers who are nice walking on ice around me. My husband said that if the woman is talking to the man then its her fault if she gets harassed.
Originally posted 2010-04-26 23:47:27. Republished by Blog Post Promoter
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you can sue him or stay away
Tell him you do not approve of his behavior, and if he does not stop at once/now, you will turn him in. Tell him you are married. Tell him he is sexual harassing you and the employer will protect you.
Just stop talking to him.
You chose to talk to him initialy.
Stop with all of the lawsuits.
Don’t be a pathetic baby. Jeeez.
GROW UP & Stop playing the victim.
The guy is a creep but you want to file a complaint. Just leave it be and get ON WITH YOUR LIFE.
DON’T DO IT.
WHAT YOU SHOULD DO IS TELL THE PERSON YOU ARE VERY BUSY AND WALK OFF. IF HE FOLLOWS YOU JUST TELL HIM SORRY, BUT I AM JUST TO BUSY SEE YA!!
DON’T LET HIM ENGAGE YOU IN ANOTHER CONVERSATION…HE WILL TRY BUT DO NOT RESPOND.
WALK AWAY FROM HIM AND HE WILL GET THE IDEA AND FIND ANOTHER VICTIM.
YOU NEED TO SPEAK TO YOUR SUPERVISOR ABOUT HIM FIRST. If your supervisor doesn’t do anything, then file a formal complaint. And oh yeah, screw that guy’s feelings. Don’t worry about offending him, he deserves it. He is way out of line.
No offense but your husband is ridiculous. If you are even asking yourself this question the answer is yes. But if you are so uneasy about it you have to confront the guy a jerk like that needs it. You could say something like this when he does it again ‘This is making me really uncomfortable would you please not talk about this with me?’ Then if he doesn’t stop you really should file a complaint.
just stay away from him if he bothers you that much. You have seen a pattern, you have identified the issues, you have stated it bothers you, then it also your responsibility to avoid HIM.
If you continue talking to him, it is then 50% your fault as much as his.
I have NO doubt your husband wishes you were smart enough to know not to talk to the guy and that you could see that communicating personal feelings to a male co-worker is setting YOU up for him thinking there is more there. Take responsibility for the message that he got, even if it was the wrong one, and state your position and move on.
touchy situation!!!
your husband doesn’t sound supportive?
tell your boss, let them handle it
at least say to the coworker, you’re being
INAPPROPRIATE!!!!!!
you may want to tape him, at least take notes
just tell him you’re Uncomfortable with his language
Good Luck
Your husband is wrong. Both by definition and by law. Harassment is what it is because it’s not welcomed and creates a hostile work environment. You have the right at any time to tell the person’s manager and/or your HR department, regardless of elapsed time. Staying after his shift to speak to you thusly is definitely strange, and could be stalking. You have the right to be treated like a human being and not like this. Please, please go to your HR people and tell them if you’re not comfortable telling him or his manager. It’s their job to help you. And there are laws against retaliation as well. I wish you safety and peace.
1. Your husband is nuts. 2. Avoid the annoying co-worker and just do your job.
I would tell him “Look, I’ve never told you this and it’s not a personal thing, but your behavior bothers me. I don’t want to be the ***** and cause problems or anything, but I feel that your behavior is inappropriate. Then briefly state why. If he defends himself, (which he will do) that is ok. Just tell him that you know he feels that way, but this is how you feel and if he wishes to remain friends with you he will respect you and stop. Your husband probably just wishes you wouldn’t talk to him anymore. Hope that helps. If other females see you do it, then maybe they will follow suit.
Speaking as a person who has been brought up on SH charges (I say flirt, she says harassment) you need to take action. Tell him in no uncertain terms his advances are not welcome. If it doesnt stop tell HIS supervisor. Tell your husband to grow a pair
No, you should NOT “file a complaint”. You should do the first thing any adult ought to do in such a situation. You need to tell the person to stop and give him the opportunity to do so. For your protection you also need to document the annoying behavior and have someone, preferably a supervisor, present when you speak to this person.
I’d tell him you don’t feel comfortable around him and don’t think his behavior is appropriate. Turn him in if he won’t listen, what other people think shouldn’t matter…it’s your safety. I’d also tell your husband he’s an idiot. He should be there for you, not making it seem like it’s your fault.
First, you are married to a jackass.
Next, let’s deal with the question. Have you told the perp that his attentions are unwelcome? If not, you do not yet have a case.
Have you told anyone in the supervisory chain above you or the perp that he continues his unwelcome attentions in spite of being asked not to? Did they do anything about it? If not, you may have a case.
Your employer is obligated to conduct an investigation and take corrective action if harassment is found to be taking place. I’ve been EEO Officer for a medium-sized corporation.
The EEOC prosecutes as many cases for retaliation as for harassment. People get reinstatement, back wages, etc.
Check out the web site below. Contact me through my avatar if I can help.
HE should sue YOU for defamation for making unsubstantiated and damaging allegations about him. You may not have explicitly referred to him, but someone may reasonably infer who he is, by identifying you on the basis of your web history.